Ilio-holo-i-ka-uaua, is the ancient Hawaiian name for the Monk Seal. It means, “dog that runs in rough water.” Hawaiian Monk Seals are endemic to the Hawaiian islands, which means they are only found there and nowhere else on the whole planet. Hawaiian Monk Seals are one of the rarest marine mammals in the world (there are only about 1,100 in the wild and their population is in decline). Can you guess why? Oh, I think you know: humans. Human nets entangling them, humans ruining the beaches where they breed and hang out/sleep (and they love to sleep), humans ruining everything all the time.
Monk Seals get their name from the folds of skin on their head that resemble a monk’s hood. Plus, they spend most of their time alone or in small groups. Monk Seals are super duper cute, and something must be done to save the cuteness.
The Black Rhinoceros has a prehensile upper lip, which it uses like a mouth-finger to eat plants. It has two horns, sometimes three, on it’s face. They look like total bad-asses because of their large size and horny faces. The males are looking for trouble; they will charge at anything they perceive as a threat, be it another male, a human walking around looking for directions, GIANT ant-mounds minding their own business, or threatening tree trunks.
The Black rhinoceros is considered CRITICALLY endangered, in other words, almost extinct. This is because they have hunted by human-apes for their horns. Because their horns are pretty. Not because humans NEED their horns for survival, but because they ENJOY the LOOK of them.
Hey. Hey, Human. Why don’t you grown your own horn instead of coveting everyone else’s? Or HEY! I have an idea, use plastic or wood or something. Maybe, I’m going to hunt YOU and use your pinky finger bones for something I totally don’t need like a sandwich toothpick. You jerks.